Every October, Wix reminds me to renew my domain and site subscription. Or, my bank reminds me that it's happened automatically. And each time, I wonder if I should have packed it in this time around. Because what am I paying for? My site is basically an archive of the creative person I was for a period. It's not a reflection of where or who I am now.
But my friends, I just can't let go.
In the past three years, I've chosen to let go of a lot of things. I left a marriage. I left a home. I left a town full of people I thought were friends, only to find those friendships dried up faster than a chilli pepper left on a hot windowsill once I'd turned my back on the life I'd led for nearly ten years.
I've been letting go of pain, of obligation, of anger. I've been letting go of expectations. But can I let go of amberinred? It feels like we're just not done yet.
So this is my little promise to myself to return soon. In what guise and for what purpose is yet to be determined. But I just can't quit.
Amber x